Skip to main content
A Magazine for

Sad Facts

Synthetic News For Loyal Citizens

I Tire of My Spine Since a very young age, I have known I do not need a spine. In school I was indoctrinated into believing the complex sta…

I Tire of My Spine
Since a very young age, I have known I do not need a spine.

In school I was indoctrinated into believing the complex sta

BIG LIES FOR TINY PARENTS

The Baby Didn't Vote “But the baby didn’t vote!” This is one of the typical garbled cries you’d hear from a remain moaner, as I call them.…

The Baby Didn't Vote 
“But the baby didn’t vote!”

This is one of the typical garbled cries you’d hear from a remain moaner, as I call them.

Clammy News for Furtive Denizens

THE REAL FASCISTS If there’s any real authoritarians here, it’s the authoritarian left. That’s what I say. I say it at least once a day in r…

THE REAL FASCISTS
If there’s any real authoritarians here, it’s the authoritarian left. That’s what I say. I say it at least once a day in r

Fractured Truths For Trembling Dudes

FREE SPEECH It used to be the case in this once-great country that British Citizens were allowed to say what they thought. So why is it I ca…

FREE SPEECH
It used to be the case in this once-great country that British Citizens were allowed to say what they thought. So why is it I ca

Dilapidated Narratives for Opinionated Goons

BREXIT DIVORCE BILL Spare me the political mumbo-jumbo on Brexit please, Liberals. So we can’t negotiate a divorce bill. During my appallin…

BREXIT DIVORCE BILL

Spare me the political mumbo-jumbo on Brexit please, Liberals. So we can’t negotiate a divorce bill. During my appallin

Moist Facts For Crestfallen Chumps

Sad Facts by Brian Kindermelch LAST CHRISTMAS ME GET FANCY LOOKING ‘Amazon Echo’ FOR CHRISTMAS. IT ROUND & SHINY AND RECOGNISES BRIAN V…

Sad Facts by Brian Kindermelch 
LAST CHRISTMAS ME GET FANCY LOOKING ‘Amazon Echo’ FOR CHRISTMAS. IT ROUND & SHINY AND RECOGNISES BRIAN V

Chlorinated News For Low Earners

PROBLEM By Brian Kindermelch HELLO NOW ME MUST SAY FIRST THAT BRIAN NOT NORMALLY WRITE LETTERS. ME HAVE MORE IMPORTANT WAY TO SPEND TIME. …

PROBLEM
By Brian Kindermelch

HELLO

NOW ME MUST SAY FIRST THAT BRIAN NOT NORMALLY WRITE LETTERS. ME HAVE MORE IMPORTANT WAY TO SPEND TIME. 

Questionable Truths For Sweaty Serfs

NATIONAL CHARACTER By Simon Klimpt Jeremy Corbyn cannot build the broad coalition he requires for power simply by dispensing platitudes int…

NATIONAL CHARACTER
By Simon Klimpt

Jeremy Corbyn cannot build the broad coalition he requires for power simply by dispensing platitudes int

TOP TIER REPORTAGE FOR A MUMBLING ELECTORATE

Sad Facts by Tracy Denholm As an adult who has, for the most part, been required to sort out their own mental health issues, developing a f…

Sad Facts by Tracy Denholm 
As an adult who has, for the most part, been required to sort out their own mental health issues, developing a f

BEAUTIFUL INFO FOR CHERISHED DWEEBS

SAD FACTS by Tracy Denholm War has always been about fucking: cannons blaring, pikes rearing, semi-automatics shooting hot rounds into the a…

SAD FACTS by Tracy Denholm
War has always been about fucking: cannons blaring, pikes rearing, semi-automatics shooting hot rounds into the a