Synthetic News For Loyal Citizens 19 February 2018 I Tire of My Spine Since a very young age, I have known I do not need a spine. In school I was indoctrinated into believing the complex…
BIG LIES FOR TINY PARENTS 23 January 2018 The Baby Didn't Vote “But the baby didn’t vote!” This is one of the typical garbled cries you’d hear from a remain moaner, as I call…
Clammy News for Furtive Denizens 24 December 2017 THE REAL FASCISTS If there’s any real authoritarians here, it’s the authoritarian left. That’s what I say. I say it at least once a day in…
Fractured Truths For Trembling Dudes 23 November 2017 FREE SPEECH It used to be the case in this once-great country that British Citizens were allowed to say what they thought. So why is it I…
Dilapidated Narratives for Opinionated Goons 24 October 2017 BREXIT DIVORCE BILL Spare me the political mumbo-jumbo on Brexit please, Liberals. So we can’t negotiate a divorce bill. During my…
Moist Facts For Crestfallen Chumps 23 September 2017 Sad Facts by Brian Kindermelch LAST CHRISTMAS ME GET FANCY LOOKING ‘Amazon Echo’ FOR CHRISTMAS. IT ROUND & SHINY AND RECOGNISES BRIAN…
Chlorinated News For Low Earners 23 August 2017 PROBLEM By Brian Kindermelch HELLO NOW ME MUST SAY FIRST THAT BRIAN NOT NORMALLY WRITE LETTERS. ME HAVE MORE IMPORTANT WAY TO SPEND TIME.…
Questionable Truths For Sweaty Serfs 26 June 2017 NATIONAL CHARACTER By Simon Klimpt Jeremy Corbyn cannot build the broad coalition he requires for power simply by dispensing platitudes…
TOP TIER REPORTAGE FOR A MUMBLING ELECTORATE 21 May 2017 Sad Facts by Tracy Denholm As an adult who has, for the most part, been required to sort out their own mental health issues, developing a…
BEAUTIFUL INFO FOR CHERISHED DWEEBS 24 April 2017 SAD FACTS by Tracy Denholm War has always been about fucking: cannons blaring, pikes rearing, semi-automatics shooting hot rounds into the…