Everyone's A Winner.

There's a bad case of Moorfoot
Where there should have been your work-boots
Cos everyone's a winner

There's a hordings around nothing
It's an 80s Sheffield theme-park
Cos everyone's a winner

There's four walls in Mosborough
you stare at from the inside,
all night, all day
Cos everyone's a winner

And your eyes watch
bill reminders, stacked against the odds
Where there used to be a paycheck
Cos everyone's a winner

And your eyes watch
A TV celebrity carnie
spinning lottery balls with a smile
cos everyone's a winner

and when you blink, the celebrity
has become prime minister
spinning lottery balls with a smile
cos everyone's a winner

and are the kids fighting upstairs?
The banging continues
and it's bailiffs at the door

Cos everyone's a winner
Everyone's a winner
Everyone's a winner


Grimethorpe Pit.

You took my father into your bowels.
Trapped him in your sulphur stained intestines;
Burnt him, bled him and blistered his soul;
that kohl eyed beauty.

Canaries sang their death song to your power.
Horses blinded by a dark light, a no light, a never ending night.

And yet, magnificent ripped men bowed before you; pick axed.
Praised their tonnage, slaked their thirst and stalked you.
Redundant now, he still honours you;

A staggered kneeling, water logged knees, and lacerated lungs.

With racing page and pen, he watches you, talks to you, and curses you;
Flames reflected in blue opaque eyes,
tired eyes, and calculates his wintry winnings.


How To Look Good Naked.

1. Forget you ever went to school.
2. Do not mention work,
or quote catch phrases
from your favourite TV programme.
3. Remember the recycling can wait until
4. Tense your inner acrobat
and arch your neck like a gazelle
wearing ballet shoes on a yacht
5. Forget you have ever spilt
spaghetti bolognaise down
a white top.
6. Wear your skin like silk,
and misplace the memory
of that awkward teenager
who was so unsure of himself,
he wouldn't get changed
in front of his own shadow.
7. Bite your bottom lip as if it owes you money.
8. Roll each word in your mouth
with soft growls and satin chocolate
as if you have never asked
a pharmacist for piles cream.
And finally
8. Take off all sharp jewellery