Death and taxes: life’s only certainties, right? Wrong! Here at Dodge & Co, we’re the world’s leading experts at leading the experts away from your money.

Are you a hard-working billionaire struggling to cover the sky high cost of a private jet? Perhaps you’re a global investor peeved at paying for public services you’ll never use? Then you need Dodge & Co. Using our trademark combination of legal expertise and zero moral fibre, we give you the tax breaks that you deserve.

And, for one month only, we’re offering a FREE tour of Sheffield’s Fargate.

Do you get out of bed for offshore company structuring? Does your bank balance prick up when you hear ‘transfer pricing’? Then you’ll love our newly-updated Tax Dodger’s Guide to Fargate. Join Dodge & Co associates, Jason and Laurence, as they show you how to dodge tax like the big boys. After all, if Cafe Nero doesn’t pay, why should you?

Come on our tax tour and learn how Boots intelligently uses debt to claim massive state subsidies. See how Starbucks sells swimming pools of coffee but never actually turns a profit. Pick up tips from Topshop’s Sir Philip Green over how to trade in Britain without paying tax here.

But that’s not all. Join us as we give thanks to the banks, inventors and facilitators of all our offshore shenanigans, offered at very reasonable rates with few questions asked. Thanks, banks!

New for 2017! In our newly updated tax tour, we’ll see how the internet big boys have completely revolutionised business in the UK while paying less tax than a benefit scrounging nurse. Yes, that’s right. You too can evade mountains of tax with the scantest of legal fig leaves. At Dodge & Co, we make sure you’re a Zuckerberg – not a Suckerberg.

We’ll also see how the global low-tax community is dealing with pernicious Communist threats like the Panama Papers. Jason and Laurence, black belts in business bullsh*t, will show you how to take the heat off your offshore financial centre by deploying the four D’s: deny, delay, deflect and destroy. At Dodge & Co, we make sure those corduroy-wearing socialists keep their unmanicured mitts off your money.

Brexit bonus! Do you find your business is held back by pesky EU environmental protections, nosy criminal investigations or enterprise-stifling domestic laws? Then let Dodge & Co explain how an offshore business can unleash your profit potential. After all, here at Dodge & Co, tax isn’t the only thing we’re avoiding.

So let us take you on our Tax Dodger’s Guide to Fargate before we take your cash on a tax-free holiday. Dodge & Co – making sure that what’s yours, stays yours.*

The Tax Dodger’s Guide to Fargate, part of Festival of Debate, runs on Saturday 13 and Saturday 20 May, 1-2pm. Meet on the Cathedral forecourt. Watch the trailer online soon…

@DodgeAndCo

*Terms and conditions apply. In dealing with Dodge & Co, some your money will become our money.